Ajay insisted I post this. It's ok to blame him.

listerine002: aloha
Kevin: Hello
nunboi: you tell me why?
hat3raide: why does kevin look like allison?
Kevin: The doctors at the hospital said that after the accident, people would respond better to a cute face

BigMcLargeHuge: Why are you so handsome?
Kevin: It's gotta be the green goo

nunboi: ¢£¥¤¾
Kevin: !%#&!#!
badmojo: Kevin, Sing us a song!
hat3raide: why does kevin get to say whatever?
Kevin: I would sing a song but my contract says I have to charge and you can't afford it

joshua: How do you feel?
Kevin: That's how I roll

BigMcLargeHuge: Why do they call a driveway a driveway when you park in it? Why do they call a parkway a parkway when you drive on it?
Kevin: I feel pretty. Oh so pretty

Kevin: English is a tricky thing

BigMcLargeHuge: And what's the deal with Airplane food?
Kevin: It's hearty and nutritious

Janice: Kevin, why do birds suddenly appear everytime you are near?
Kevin: ...everytime you are near

joshua: What time did you go to bed
Kevin: I went to bed right after Geore Lopez

beta_may: what's your favorite tv show?
Kevin: Lost is super duper.
beta_may: What's your favorite food?
Kevin: Meat, I like lost of dead animals

Janice: Can you speed up time so we can all go home now?
Kevin: No and just for asking I will slow it down so we have more time together

joshua: Who is your favorite person in the office?
Kevin: I like DVG because he yells the loudest

froggy: how come you did not win GOTW this week?
Kevin: I'm was busy with working so that the company can make mucho dinero

froggy: will you come to my birthday party?
Kevin: Only if you have a hot sister

froggy: was OJ framed?
Kevin: I'm more of an apple juice guy

joshua: Dear Kevin, My mom says I should not pick at my open wounds... but it feels so good. What do you do to your open wounds?
Kevin: Let the dog go after them for a while

BigMcLargeHuge: Can you give me some pigskins?
Kevin: I could but then you'd never know the value of a pigskin

hat3raide: what's your favorite movie?
Kevin: I sure am partial to the little mermaid

MarkA: Why is Allison moderating the questions?
Kevin: I believe it has to do with her control issues

randyrandy: Will this question make it past Allison?
Kevin: No probably not

MarkA: How come Ali doesn't eat Granola anymore?
Kevin: Long story short, soft stools

BigMcLargeHuge: Will Heidi Klum ever marry me?
Kevin: Well, Seal is a tough guy but maybe you could take him by surprise

badmojo: what is Allison's favorite movie?
Kevin: Allison loves Williow

hat3raide: pb&j or ham&cheese ?
Kevin: I ate pb&j for many years, but ham and cheese has two great things melded together

Janice: Angelina or Jen?
Kevin: Jen wearing a tie

BigMcLargeHuge: What are we supposed to be testing now?
Kevin: my patience

MarkA: What are you thoughts about Bernie Madoff
Kevin: My thoughts are that I never took that money from him and you can't prove anything

BigMcLargeHuge: Who would win in a fight between Donkey Kong and you rmom?
Kevin: My mom pretty much could win a fight against any fictional character

hat3raide: so hypothetically, there's a propeller stabled to your head, and a lazer gun, how many gameballs could you save?
Kevin: Asleep or blindfolded?

eaglesball: Why is it called a tv "set" when there's only one?!
Kevin: I have two, maybe you just didn't have enough for the second one

BigMcLargeHuge: Pop quiz hotshot: you're trapped in a burning building with Godzilla and the Pope. Who do you save first?
Kevin: feed the Pope to Godzilla and make friends. The ride him to safety

Janice: Do these pants make my butt look big?
Kevin: Don't blame the pants, they have enough to cover already

MarkA: Kevin can I be excused so I can finish "The Wave"?
Kevin: You will have to wait for the bell

eaglesball: Where is Kelly Clarkson?
Kevin: Not tied up in my closet, if that's what you mean

badmojo: who is kelly clarkson?
hat3raide: what's "The Wave"?
Kevin: She is a cornfed country girl who came to the city to make it big.

MarkA: If i play 60 by myself, will I go blind?
Kevin: The "Wave" is a cheering technique executed by a group of people

Kevin: on;ly if you do it more than once a day

badmojo: that's true
eaglesball: Is this really Kelly Clarkson? You rock!
BigMcLargeHuge: What is the smoke monster?
Kevin: No, sorry. Can someone remove the Kelly Clarkson fan?

randyrandy: All signs point to no
BigMcLargeHuge: Why does it say "Amazing" above your name next to your picture.
Kevin: Only a handful of people ever find out

BigMcLargeHuge: Why are you so slow at crafting responses?
Kevin: Thoughtful responses get me in less trouble

randyrandy: What if you replace the lazer gun with a cat fish?
Kevin: I suppose you'd have to find the trigger on a catfish

BigMcLargeHuge: What happens when you die?
Kevin: I take you with me

hat3raide: superbowl - still bitter?
Kevin: Always bitter. So very bitter.

Janice: You've run out of toilet paper. What DO you do?
Kevin: Toliet paper? What's that?

badmojo: Under Your Desk!?
Kevin: Earthquake!!!

hat3raide: How long will the Gagne-Bakst diet last?
Kevin: The diet will last as long as my sobriety

badmojo: will Sean finally sleep?
Kevin: Yes. Comfortably in your arms

MarkA: BILLY HERE!!!!
Kevin: ...

beta_may: why are my hands so cold?
Kevin: Let me check my meta data on that

badmojo: If May is cold, why are the rest of us sweating out here?
Kevin: Because may likes her men sweaty

Allison: okay i've had enough, can we end this?
Kevin: I think we must

Allison: thanks guys!
Kevin: Adios

badmojo: yay!
Kevin: Ok Allison lied... keep going

BigMcLargeHuge: Can you grow a moustache?
Kevin: Some may call it a moustache other just think i had chocolate milk

randyrandy: Why is my iced coffee cup empty?
Kevin: That answer can only come from within

badmojo: Do unicorns poop pink marshmellows?
Kevin: And gumdrops. and they vomit rainbows

BigMcLargeHuge: What was the name of the Unicorn in The Neverending Story?
Kevin: There was a unicorn? Why do you know so much about unicorns?

randyrandy: Will Aliison approve violent questions regarding unicorns?
Kevin: I don't know, let's try

BigMcLargeHuge: Who killed JFK?
Kevin: Mark probably

Janice: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Kevin: If he ever stops drinking he might get at least his quota

BigMcLargeHuge: Who is your daddy, and what does he do?
Kevin: Our mom says our dad is a real...er... he's a banker

randyrandy: If a heard of unicorn were violemntly slaughterd by as food for the last starving colony pof humans, would you eat them?
Kevin: The real question is:
does it blend?
badmojo: A stitch in time saves nine what?
Kevin: I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you

randyrandy: Do you have bad circulation?
Kevin: It was a cold night and I was drunk. Let it go man

BigMcLargeHuge: Is Keyser Soze really Kevin Spacey? Is Bruce Willis really dead the whole time? Is Rosebud a sled?
Kevin: Press stop and go outside

beta_may: what would happen if nick nolte and gary busey were in the same room?
Kevin: Chaos the likes of which have never seen before. I believe it's mentioned somewhere in the bible as one of the signs of the end of the world

BigMcLargeHuge: What's the shortest path between two points?
Kevin: Up

badmojo: but why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
Kevin: Because the carrot ate it's vegetables

randyrandy: What is the airpeed of a swallow?
Kevin: European?

hat3raide: are you really an nfl player?
Kevin: In a word, no. In many words Yes and don't question it

BigMcLargeHuge: Will Jimmy have to do a custom drawing for every guest we hame?
Kevin: Yes, he is very excited

BigMcLargeHuge: Will Jimmy have to do a special drawing for every special guest we have?
Kevin: you're testing your luck here

BigMcLargeHuge: Yes I'm in chat.
Kevin: me too! Yay us!

randyrandy: the lights' glows are glue and overlapping the bounding box. Is that a bad thing?
Kevin: Do not eat the things you find

BigMcLargeHuge: Was my last question a question?
Kevin: Regardless, I answered it.

froggy: whats the best question you've gotten today?
Kevin: There were some great people here today but froggy probably had the best, most intelligent questions

randyrandy: what is the mediocrest question you've got today?
Kevin: Probably the one from randyrandy asking what the mediocrest question was

BigMcLargeHuge: How long will most chats that we have last?
Kevin: The End.

Kevin: I mean, thanks. The End

randyrandy: I have a post-it
BigMcLargeHuge: Is that really the end?
BigMcLargeHuge: How do users know when the chat really ends?
BigMcLargeHuge: Do they get kicked out?
BigMcLargeHuge: Is that what she said?